Choosing music for your church wedding ceremony

     As a music director/singer/keyboardist, I am continually amazed at  the difficulty some brides have in selecting music for their church ceremony. Here are the basics.

     First of all, the organist/pianist will usually begin to play music in the church as the guests are arriving. Usually when I play weddings, I play soft classical music here, but if there are special songs or hymns that are meaningful to the couple, this is a good place to fit those songs in as prelude music.

It is customary for a special song to be played and/or sung as the mothers and/or grandmothers are escorted down the aisle. The mothers/grandmothers are usually the last guests to be seated before the ceremony begins with the bridal party's entrance. In Catholic churches, usually this is the time for an "Ave Maria" or a more modern version, such as Carey Landry's "Hail Mary, Gentle Woman." is played or sung. There are other songs that may be more appropriate, depending on the tastes of the parties involved.

When the mothers/grandmothers have been seated, it is time for the bridal party to enter. Depending on whether or not it is a big church with  a long aisle to come down, or whether or not the bridal party is small or large, the music that the bridal party enters to could be the same music as the bride enters in. Sometimes, if the aisle is long and the  wedding party is large, a separate song will be played for the bridal party's entrance only. A favorite here seems to be Pachelbal's Cannon in D. When the bridal party has entered and reached the front of the church, the bride will process in. If she is entering to the same music, the organist/keyboardist could change the stops on the organ to signal a more dramatic entrance -- either making the organ louder or grander. If a different song is to be played, the bride will wait until the music changes, and then make her entrance. A favorite entrance song here is Purcell's "Trumpet Voluntary" sometimes known by other names.

The next piece of music during most weddings is a psalm setting. This is what is sung between two readings. In Catholic wedding ceremonies, there is usually a first reading, from the Old Testament, and a second reading, from the New Testament. The psalm is sung between those two readings. There are many psalms in the Bible that have musical settings and are appropriate for weddings. One would be Psalm 103 "The Lord is Kind and Merciful," or another is Psalm 42 "As the Deer Longs." Yet another is Psalm 118 "This is the Day." A good idea might be to browse through the Psalms in the Bible, and find one that has words that touch the hearts of the bride and groom. Then ask the music director of the church if there is a musical setting that goes with the chosen psalm.

During the wedding ceremony, there are some optional parts -- such as the lighting of the Unity Candle, or the distribution of roses to the parents of the bride and groom. At these points in the ceremony, a song can be sung, or instrumental music can be played. It is best to check with the music director of the church you are being married in, to see what is the proper tradition to follow at that particular church.

Sometimes there will be a song (hymn) as the gifts of bread and wine are brought to the altar. There will be another such hymn as the guests receive communion. The music chosen should reflect how the couple feels about their relationship to God and each other. The primary reason to have a marriage blest in a church, is to ask God to foster and bless the relationship. Therefore, this is not the time for love songs or songs that are romantic in nature -- those can be performed at the wedding reception. Rather, the music in the church should be God-centered.

The closing piece of music is usually a march-like piece or a piece of joyful celebration as the bride and groom, the bridal party, and guests exit the church.  A few suggestions here would be Bach's "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring," or Beethoven's "Ode to Joy" from his 9th symphony.